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Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Mournful


Remembering a life
Montreal, QC, July 2009


A little over a year ago, I came to this cemetery with my father to visit the graves of our extended family*. I had been wanting to make this trip with him for years, but for various reasons, most of them having to do with his failing health, it had never worked out until then.

We lost him barely six weeks after this photo was taken, so in retrospect I'm glad we had this day. It's one of the things I hold on to when I find myself drifting in the nebulous vastness of losing a parent. I simply focus on specific days, events or memories and, for a few minutes at least, I feel a small sense of comfort.

Someday I suppose I'll return to this place. And when I do, I'll have to remember where everyone is, and I'll have to retrace our steps alone. And I'll replay this day in my head as if it was yesterday. And I'll wish I could actually go back and be here with him, if only for a moment.

This life thing isn't always easy.

* Previous entries here, here and here.

5 comments:

  1. Hey Carmi!

    Whilst it has been a while since I have visited, I get your feed into my inbox though, I thought I had to comment here... I lost my wife in April last year, and I find comfort in visiting her still... I hope that you too, will do so one day if not already...

    But, I wanted to share, as it is thematic Photographic as well, some typical Australian Flowers since you have a great theme this week!! AussiePomm (Australian Flowers).

    ReplyDelete
  2. Your story reminds me of going to the cemetery with my father and grandmother.

    All our immediate family are buried close together luckily, but to visit all the extended family and friends we had to do a long walk from one end of Sydney's largest cemetery to the other, plus a few circles in between.

    I couldn't for the life of me remember where everyone is now!

    I'm glad you have such a lovely memory of time spent with your father.

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  3. Alone? Mais non monsieur! (Damn I hope that's right.) Perhaps absent the company of another carbon-based life form. That much I'll give you. But never alone.

    None of us are ever alone.

    Especially not the fundamentally good ones of us such as yourself.

    ReplyDelete
  4. The best things in life are free

    You don't miss the water til the well runs dry

    etc...etc... yawn

    There aren't many things I am sure about but we should appreciate all appreciate our parents while we can

    FREE iPod

    ReplyDelete

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