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Monday, August 05, 2024

11 years on...

Celebrating another bonus sunrise
Middlesex Centre, ON
August 5, 2024
This photo originally shared on Instagram


So today marks 11 years since I had a stroke.

I write and speak about it every now and then not because I have a particular desire to revisit the most frightening experience of my and my family’s life, but because I feel a responsibility to anyone else who’s gone through the same thing.

And every time I share my story, I get different reactions. To some folks, it’s a reminder of a now-familiar story. To others, it’s the first they’ve heard of it.

Whatever the case, it isn’t something I’m willing to let go. From the moment my brain decided to reboot itself, it became apparent that this was going to fundamentally reshape me. And while I initially bristled at the prospect of being known strictly through the lens of someone who had a serious illness, I eventually found my voice and accepted it.

People still stare at me, lingering over the “how are you?” part of the conversation whenever we reconnect. I’m used to them not quite believing me when I say I’m fine. I don’t take the conversation much further because I really do appreciate their concern, and I don’t want to add even more darkness to the discussion.

Truth is, though, I’m terrified. I worry about recurrence - the data suggests I’m at increased risk of stroke because I’ve already had one.

I also worry about a long list of other neurological funsies that lurk in the shadows. I fret every time I forget a factoid or misplace my keys, and wonder if it’s normal or if it’s a sign.

But strangely, I don’t regret it. Not that I’d have wished to be struck down, but rather perversely I think the experience made me better than I was. I hold onto small moments far more deliberately than I ever did. I’d like to think it helped me become more empathetic, hopefully a better husband, dad, writer, and human being.

Maybe I’m wrong. But I’m grateful for every bonus day I’ve gotten since August 5, 2013.

So this morning I got on the bike before sunrise and raced ahead of the rain into farm country. The wind in my face made me feel alive - something I didn’t really feel as acutely before that unforgettable day.

I’m hopeful that my experience might help other stroke victims continue to venture out, as well.

In that sense, we’re not victims at all.

#strokeawareness #family #health #everything

Related:
START HERE: So, about that stroke - August 2014
#3: More stroke stuff... - August 2014
Stroke survivor shares his story, London Free Press, Aug 14, 2014
Coming up on Canada AM - Lookahead to February 2015 interview
Winding down the day that was - February 2015 - incl link to Canada AM/Heart/Stroke Month segment
Two years on... - August 2015
Three bonus years - August 2016
Four years later - August 2017
Five years on - August 2018
Seven years on, August 2020
Eight years on, August 2021
Nine years on... August 2022
Ten years on... August 2023

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