Tuesday, July 05, 2011

Another year I clearly don't deserve

At precisely 19 years after the moment when my fiance became my wife, I will be rather ingloriously piloting a rental car through the hinterlands of New York and New Jersey, some 800 km from home. That's right: I'm celebrating our wedding anniversary by going on a business trip. Alone.

Annals of marriage, eh?

Before you slice me a new one, bear in mind that the career thing is what allows the home thing to continue along its merry way. We work, we get paid, we live. Sometimes things don't align as neatly as we'd like, like this week when the project schedule dictated my presence far away. It is what it is, and I'll find some way to ensure the remaining 364 days of our 20th year (!) of marriage are somewhat more charmed. And together.

My oafishness aside, I recognize how lucky I am. I'm as difficult to live with as you can imagine. Probably worse. I forget stuff. I wander off at the most inconvenient moments. I'm curmudgeonly. I've heard that I snore. I shrink stuff in the dryer. It's hell to get me out of bed in the morning. I could go on for a while...

(And here you thought my online persona was oh so pristine. Sorry for the letdown. I'm human.)

And through it all, my wife somehow found me attractive enough to date, then marry, then stay married to. Almost two decades on, I'm still trying to figure out what it is that she sees, why she hasn't fled to the exits. I know I'm the lucky bastard here, the one who gets to spend a lifetime with a kind-hearted, natural-born mother, a virtuoso cook, a gifted teacher, a good soul who isn't just my best friend, but the greatest friend to those lucky enough to know her.

Our family's world revolves around her, and it all started with a few sacred words under the chupah and a shattered glass under my foot. What we've built since then frankly amazes me, and I can't imagine having taken this journey with anyone else. Call me incredibly selfish, but I never want it to end.

Your turn: Your anniversary wish for my wife is...?

One more thing: My wife posted this entry to her blog. I hope you'll drop in and share a happy word or two with her.


Dianne - Bunny Trails said...

Congratulations, Carmi. Remember that your marriage isn't built on the most spectacular anniversaries - it's built on moments and days and weeks and years together. I'm very happy for you both and anticipate many more happy anniversaries for you!!

BTW - My husband & I spent our 1st anniversary (OUR FIRST!!) 1,200 miles apart. He was with my parents in CA and I was with my sister in CO. We'll celebrate 25 years next month. ;-)

Anonymous said...

Seeing as you are going to New Jersey, my wish for your wife is that you spend an day with Snooki. This will be hell for you and make you appreciote your wife more.

P.S. Mrs. Carmi: when Carmi gets home, wear a pouf wig and orange spray tan and greet him at the door with a " Joisey Accent".

MorahMommy said...

Happy anniversary my sweet! We never need a special day to say "I love you!"

You definitely deserved! We make a great team. Just come home safely!


Pamela said...

I'm not going to ream you.
Obviously it is the quality of time you spend on the daily grind ~. Everyday is special.

Cloudia said...

May you be happy for a hundred years!

(and us too :)

Aloha from Waikiki

Comfort Spiral


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MB said...

Happy Anniversary! I've said it before and I'll say it again ~ YOU ARE A VERY LUCKY MAN. Hope you get to have a special anniversary celebration when you return home. Travel safe.

daisy said...

Happy Anniversary!

Anne said...

Happy Anniversary! Dan and will celebrate 21 years tomorrow.

young-eclectic-encounters said...

Congrats on your anniversary!
Well I've been married for over 30 years and I certainly can beat you on the anniversary goof-ups- Both my husband and I forgot our anniversary for the first 15 years we were married.(It is not a good idea to get married close to christmas and than have two kids born in Jan). It never caused a rift since we both forgot and we are still going strong in our marriage and it certainly has become a family joke.
Johnina :^A

Alexia said...

Hmm - you may be grumpy and untidy at times - who of us is perfect? But I believe that people receive in direct proportion to what they give... I think you are both very lucky to have found each other.
Just visited your wife's blog to wish her well, too. Take care of each other :)

Sara said...

Congratulations, Carmi - I am most happy for you and the Mrs. I often read your posts about family and feel that you both have "done" it right!

Mojo said...

Oops. From those of us who came in late, I can think of no two people who offer more hope for the survival of love in the 21st century than you two.

Ever since Wendy and I passed the one-year-together mark, one or the other of us will frequently tell the other "Happy Anniversary" at random. Because I realized that as of May 1 of this year, every day is now the anniversary of something wonderful. I might not remember specifically what, mind you, but I know without a doubt that it was wonderful. Because every day since she entered my life has been exactly that. Even the days that were otherwise heinous have been amazing simply because she was a part of them.

I hope you two have what you have for all eternity. It's a source of great encouragement to us all.