Finding an alone moment

Bridge over troubled waters
London, ON, December 2009 [Click photo to enlarge]

About this photo: Our latest Thematic Photographic theme is 2009, The Year That Was. To join in, simply share your favorite photos from the past year. Click here to get started.

As the year I'd like to forget draws to a close, I've been trying to carve out little snippets of time for myself wherever I can find them. I don't necessarily want to shut anyone else out - indeed, keeping connected to the people who matter most has been a lifeline for me these last few months - but it feels good for my soul to simply take in the silence for a bit.

Photography gives me lots of opportunities to have reflective moments like this one. On my way to shul one morning, I stopped on the university campus and took in this scene from the bridge that crosses the Thames River. Nothing earth shattering in any of it, but it felt good to stand alone in a quiet place, and it feels good to remember this particular moment through a picture.

Your turn: Where do you go to be alone?

One more thing: I'm not one to celebrate the New Year to any great extent. Frankly, I wish we attached similar importance to the other 364 days of the year. But my curmudgeonly nature aside, please know I'm thinking of you all, and wishing you only goodness and peace, health and happiness as 2010 gets underway. You've enriched my year by sharing your experiences here, and I look forward to more sharing and learning in 2010. All the best, and thanks.

Thematic Photographic 82 - 2009, The Year That Was

Talking about my generation
London, ON
September 2009 [top]
July 2009 [bottom]
[Please click all photos to enlarge]

On Mojo's wise suggestion, our Thematic Photographic theme for the the next week is 2009, the year that was. In many respects it's been a year many of us would like to forget. But the mere fact that we have the opportunity to reflect at all is, in itself, sufficient cause for celebration. We're here, and that's all that matters.

So I hope you use this theme as an opportunity to look back and to be thankful for whatever blessings the year brought you. And in my case, nothing tops my wife and kids. So to kick off my own contributions to this week's theme, I present the four people who somehow managed to help me focus on the good, and who somehow managed to keep me whole.

About this theme: You'll notice a couple of new additions to the way we run Thematic:

• First, the theme name is a phrase and not a word. For most of its existence, themes have been one word only. I think loosening the limits and allowing a few descriptive words in the title may make things easier on everyone and give y'all more to work with.
• Second, I'm putting more than one picture in. No sense limiting myself on the photographic end, either, right? Feel free to do the same.

Your turn: Please post as many 2009-themed pictures to your blog, then paste a link in a comment here so other folks can find you. And if you've got a thought or two on the changes, I'd love to hear 'em. Enjoy...

Twinkle toes

Digital
Laval, QC, July 2009

I thought I'd say goodbye to this week's theme with a bit of a self portrait - and a quick story. When I was a kid, I spent a couple of years in a cast due to wonky hips that, thankfully, are now fully functional. It was a two-leg, a-framed contraption that forever branded me as "the kid in the cast" and taught me to always think first about what it's like to walk in someone else's shoes.

Which is ironic given I didn't wear shoes between the age of 4 and 6. Instead, my toes stuck out of little holes at the bottom of the cast. And I wiggled them. Often. Because that was pretty much the only exercise they got. And it looked pretty funny, too. And if you caught an adult at just the right time, it made them laugh. Other kids in the ward, too.

So occasionally I train my lens on my long-since-freed toes. Because I still like to wiggle them. And I still like to see others smile when I do.

Your turn: Making complete strangers happy. Please discuss.

One more thing: Please pop back in tonight at 7:00 p.m. EST. Our next Thematic theme, 2009 - the year that was, launches then, and I suspect you won't want to miss out. Well, at least I hope you won't!

Keeping the night at bay

Oasis of light
Toronto, ON, November 2009

About this photo: We're slowly bringing Thematic Photographic's feet week to a close. Click this link to see where this ridiculousness all began. Thanks to Mojo's kindness, we have a new theme for next week: 2009, the year that was. Feel free to start thinking about which of your pics from the last year are most memorable, and which ones you'd like to share. Launch post goes up tomorrow (Wednesday) at 7:00 p.m. EST.

I seem to be bringing home more moody photos these days (see here, here and here.) I guess that's understandable given the kind of year we've had, but it still jars me a little when I see more shades of grey than I'm used to. Although I never thought the artistically brooding thing really fit me, I realize I may need to rethink that a bit, albeit temporarily.

Regardless, this somewhat dark chapter has some side benefits. It's allowed me to explore the technical challenges of shooting darker scenes. It's also forced me to not rely on color as a crutch. Which, hopefully, may help me get better at this photography thing after all. Time will tell. For now, however, I offer this sombre view, taken as I reflectively walked back to Toronto's Union Station and headed home to my family.

Your turn: Do your photos reflect your mood? How?

Found on a Dunkin Donuts floor

The things we see when we look down
New York, NY, November 2009

We'd come to this Dunkin Donuts, tucked into a New York street corner, to fill the kids' tummies with unhealthy fare - I know, annals of parenting... - in the midst of a blink-and-you-miss-it weekend in the big city. The server helping my wife didn't take kindly to my guerilla-dad photographic style, and used her broken English and hand signals to get me to put the camera away. This was the last picture I took before it dawned on me that I had crossed a line. It happens on occasion. This won't be the last time, either.

As I reviewed the pictures later on, this one stood out because it was typically bizarre. I had spent more than enough time that day capturing the usual tourist- kitschy New York scenes - the Empire State Building, Times Square, Broadway and others - so it felt right to have something completely atypical as well. I'm willing to bet no one ever walked into this nondescript store and took pictures of the floor.

Makes me wonder what other ridiculously routine scenes await me. Anyone care to guess?

Shoes that dangle in the sky

Really hi-tops
London, ON, July 2009

I will never understand the university/college-town tradition of tossing a pair of shoes over the top of a power line. I realize it's probably tied to some sort of fraternity or sorority ritual, but it still strikes me as wasteful and disrespectful. After all, if it's OK to hang a pair of shoes from here, why not that old coat I'd been meaning to toss? Or whatever other garbage I found lying around the house and wanted to see dangling above the neighborhood for the next six months?

Re-reading that last paragraph, I realize I'm rapidly becoming an old curmudgeon. G-d help me. There, I'm good.

So in celebration of feet week - please see here if this makes no sense to you - I wanted to share this apparent misunderstanding of Nike's "Just Do It" slogan. The "It" in this case should not involve ruining an apparently perfectly good pair of shoes. Oops, there goes that curmudgeonly voice again. I'll go back to muttering, alone, on my porch.

Your turn: Who owned these shoes? How did they come to be here?

Attention K Mart shoppers

Blue light special, aisle 5
New York, NY
November 2009

About this photo: Thematic Photographic explores "feet" through next Wednesday. As you can see, feet can take many different forms...to share yours, just click here.

I learned long ago to look left when everyone else is looking right. I may not get the same story as everyone else, or even the story that folks might expect, but I'm pretty much guaranteed that whatever I bring home is original.

A lot of people don't get that, but I also learned long ago to stop worrying about what those lots of people think. I don't much care about popularity. Guess that explains why I never actually was that popular. But that's a story for another day.

So, about this picture: In a crowded restaurant filled with well wishers gathered from all corners of the continent for a wedding, I turned away from the hordes and explored the corners of the room. And I had help: In an ultra chic restaurant carved out of a heritage building that wears its rough-brick history as a fish market proudly on its sleeve, our daughter found a spot that she didn't want us to forget. She took my hand and led me here. She talked about the shade of blue, how it almost seemed to paint the old brick.

With Dahlia's help, I found the story that'll help us both remember this place. I'm sure it won't matter a whole lot to most other folks. But it'll matter to us both, which is pretty much the only thing that matters to me.

Your turn: I'm blessed to be surrounded by a wife and kids who regularly, innately and easily share their vision with me. Do you have partners who guide you in your own artistic endeavors? Do tell!

He can sleep anywhere

Peace amid the party
New York, NY, November 2009

About this photo: Thematic Photographic celebrates feet this week. To get in on the stinky action, just click here.

Noah has no throttle. When he's on, he goes full bore and doesn't stop until he's absolutely out of gas. Here, he emptied his tank - happily, as ever - in the middle of his cousin's wedding. So after some very kind and understanding staff members fetched a few huge pillows, we set him up in a tucked-away corner and let him snooze amid the still-raging party. I still don't know how he managed this, but I am mighty impressed.

As he slept, I stared at his too-large-for-his-age feet - festooned in shoes carefully chosen by mama - and wondered how tall he'd someday grow. However high he eventually reaches, he's the kind of kid who will always find a way to give his mom the hugs she so richly deserves.

Your turn: The strangest place you've ever fallen asleep is...?

Standpipe at my feet

When I look down...
New York, NY, November 2009

About this photo: It's "feet" week all week long here at Written Inc. If you're hankering for some Thematic Photographic nuttiness, head this way and don't look back. Or down.

Over all the years that I went to school and worked in Montreal's downtown core, I never looked down long enough to notice whether my town had standpipes sprouting out of the sidewalks. But when I went to New York, they seemed to be everywhere. I particularly liked this red one.

So I thought it made sense to stand beside a standpipe, if only to reinforce my sense of wonder at things my feeble brain fails to understand. Perhaps it's just as well that I just appreciate something for its simple aesthetic without necessarily researching it until the cows come home.

Your turn: Things we fail to notice. Please discuss.

You've Got Mail

I was driving the gang to school the other morning. Although it takes barely 15 minutes door-to-door, it's an important stretch of together-time that I don't often get because I work from home. So on a day when our respective schedules meant I needed the car during the day, I found myself at the wheel. And as my wife and I often do when we drive, we talk. About the everyday yin and yang of life that you might otherwise miss if you didn't have in-between moments like these.

As we ran through the highlights of the day ahead, my wife told me she had cleaned up the voicemail on our home phone. I take the blame, because I'm a shameless message saver. Send me an e-mail and I'm more apt to archive and not delete it. Because you never know when you'll need it. Same thing with voicemail: I want to make sure Debbie hears the message before it gets deleted into oblivion.

That's how we ended up with 22 old messages clogging our inbox, the Whining Betty voice from the phone company not-so-politely advising us that our mailbox was almost full. Thanks, Betty, for the heads-up.

Debbie deleted them all. Except one: From my dad. He had left it a few days before he died. It wasn't anything earth shattering, just the usual checking-in-we'll-talk-later kind of message. "I just couldn't," she said, her voice haltingly trailing off into silence.

I felt the now-familiar wave of sadness that precedes unprovoked tears. I wanted to stop the car and just hug her. But we were in the middle of traffic, and the clock beckoned. It was her loss, too, and it's just as important for her to hold on to the digitized remnants of a life well lived as it is for me.

Thematic Photographic 81 - Feet

Stampede
New York, NY, November 2009

Zach and I had walked 24 blocks up 5th Avenue to see this place, Apple's flagship retail store. Since he inherited my admiration of all things related to this fruit-themed tech company, it seemed natural for us to make the trek and drink in the experience of this place.

Of course, 24 blocks is a tough sled for anyone. Worse when you consider the need to walk another 24 blocks back to where we started. So both of us were pretty tuckered out by the time we got there. But not too tuckered out to enjoy the sight of hordes of fans descending the glass staircase under the ginormous glass cube. Say what you want about Apple, but this is a company that understands how to make memorable experiences whether you're using its products or visiting one of its stores.

Your turn: Thematic Photographic's theme this week is "feet". No, I'm not sure why this is so. I guess I was feeling cheeky. Participation is simple: Post a similarly themed pic on your blog, then pop back here and paste the link into a comment. Repeat as often as you wish. For more info on how TP works, click here.

Let there be light

Turned 90 degrees
New York, NY, November 2009

About this photo: We're wrapping up our week-long exploration of the abstract theme, and we hope you've had fun along the way (click here if I'm making no sense.) At exactly 7:00 o.m. EST (hey, that's TONIGHT!) we launch our new TP theme. This week, it's feet. Yes, feet. Don't ask...just throw caution to the wind and enjoy the journey.

It's the kind of scene that countless people come across every day, yet few, if any, ever take the time to appreciate. From where I sit, life's too short to miss out on the fun stuff. So the next time you're in the Carlton Hotel on Madison Avenue, don't be afraid to tilt your head in a few unique directions and see if the ordinary now looks somewhat less so.

In fact, feel free to do the same no matter what hotel - or building, or open space, or whatever... - you happen to be visiting. You may surprise yourself in the process.

Your turn: Look up right now. What do you see?

A different point of view

Who says it's out of focus?
Toronto, ON, December 2009

About this photo: Thematic Photographic explores abstract-themed photos all week long. If you've got one you'd like to share - and who doesn't? - just click here to kickstart the insanity. New theme goes live tomorrow (Wednesday) at 7:00 p.m. EST. What will it be? What would you like it to be?

Remember when you were a kid and you had the ability to stare at the same thing for an inordinate length of time without getting bored? At some point, you'd squint your eyes just so and the scene would go all buggy, kind of like a bad Beatles video where you just knew the producer had been dipping into the mind altering substances.

Well, I'm not much of a Beatles fan (sorry), and I've never been one to dip into the mind altering stuff, either. But I do enjoy altering the view from time to time. Just because my camera has a focus ring doesn't mean I have to make it tack sharp every time out. Sometimes, a creative twist or two can help me tell a very different story.

Your turn: What do you think this is? What does it remind you of?

Abstracted cruelty

Arbeit Macht Frei/Work Sets You Free
London, ON, April 2009

About this photo: This is a detail taken from the Holocaust Memorial Center at the London Jewish Community Center. It was installed earlier this year to reaffirm how community and education stand against the kind of hatred that allowed the Holocaust to happen in the first place. To participate in our latest Thematic Photographic theme, abstract, please click here.

There is no such thing as a happy ending when discussing anything remotely connected with the Holocaust, but the recovery of the sign over the entrance to the Auschwitz death camp at least closes the book on a particularly ugly chapter and reinforces efforts to ensure the world is never allowed to forget what happened here.

The Holocaust was the ultimate example of humanity's ability to abstract the reality of others, to dehumanize entire groups so thoroughly that it wasn't much of a stretch for entire populations to join in the process of extermination. That such thinking continues to this day should alarm us to no end. I guess that makes the threat anything but abstract.

Your turn: Overcoming hatred and bigotry. Please discuss.

Caption This - On Hold

Hi all. This being Sunday, I'd normally be posting a Caption This entry and asking for your help in coming up with something zingy and fun. I'm going to put the fun on hold for a bit because I'm just not feeling particularly zingy and/or fun right about now. And when I get this way, I prefer to have less rigidity and structure around me. Call it yet another quirk of Carmi.

So I'm not going to cancel CT completely, but I do want to set it aside for a bit so I can get back to the kind of freer-form blogging that I used to do but got away from as I evolved two weekly traditions - Caption This and Thematic Photographic - here.

I'll keep TP up and running for now, but given the fact that nothing's inviolable, I may yet have news on that front before long as well.

I guess I'm getting reflective as we prepare to say goodbye to 2009. It's been a difficult year from where I sit, and I'd be remiss if I didn't shake things up a bit before the transition to 2010. I'm slowly learning to let go of things before I necessarily figure out what I'm going to grab on to next - it's what reminds me of life's unpredictable beauty. If anything, I believe this kind of admittedly minor change will help me continue to focus on the things that matter most to me: My wife, our kids, our life and our future.

Thank you for your understanding, and I do hope you continue to share this bloggy journey with me. I'll still be writing and shooting and sharing, albeit in a slightly less formalized form.

Abstract light

Out of the darkness
Toronto, ON, March 2009

About this photo: We're exploring abstract themes this week. Please click here for the launch entry for this Thematic Photographic theme.

The platforms at Toronto's Union Station (wiki) aren't the highlight of anyone's trip. They're as close to dark, damp, exhaust-choked warehouses as you'll get. The front of the building is, of course, something of an architectural wonder. But back here where the tracks run? Um, not so much.

Still, I'm something of a heretic in that I believe this space has a beauty all its own. As your train arrives in Toronto, you go from enjoying the aerial spectacle of the skyline to near-darkness as you slowly roll into the covered shed over the platform. Then as you disembark onto the narrow, crumbling concrete walkway beside the tracks, you hang back, away from the sheepwalking crowds plodding their way toward the escalators.

As your eyes adjust to the murky light, you begin to notice little details, the hanging light fixtures, the shadows, the flourishes of corrugated metal. There's a gritty, industrial elegance to this place. You feel a quick pang of regret that more people don't stop and smell the rust-tinged, figurative roses more often.

Somewhat sadly, this space will soon cease to exist. The government's just announced a grand plan to totally rebuild the platforms and turn them into brightly lit, dramatic examples of what Europeans have done so well for so long. The end result will doubtless be impressive in its own right. But the grittiness and thoughtfulness will be gone.

Your turn: The beauty of darkness. Please discuss.

Memories of an abstract childhood

Let there be light
Montreal, QC, October 2009

About this photo: It's Thematic Photographic's abstract week all week long. Please follow this link if you'd like to share an abstract-themed photo or experience.

We were in my mother-in-law's hospital room, and as usual I found my eyes absorbing the subtle details of this place. While the kids bantered with their grandparents and filled the room with the kind of happiness every patient would appreciate 24/7, my mind wandered back to my own experiences as a patient in this same hospital. I always remembered the light, for some reason, and how it changed the tone of my room and the entire paediatrics unit from the moment I woke up until tuck-in.

My eyes always seemed to snap open before sunrise, just as the sky was beginning to brighten. While waiting for my parents to get in, I would often lie in bed and watch the shadows from the venetian blinds slowly brighten and begin their dance across the wall. I always found it neat that what started out as a muted, yellowy light soon brightened into a whiter, hotter tone that completely changed the feel of my drably painted room.

Standing here as an adult, it occurred to me that the scene hadn't changed much in all those years. I raised my camera and snapped away, capturing more of a memory than an image. Sometimes, that's all you can do when you're somewhere you wish you didn't have to be.

Your turn: I don't quite know what story this photo is telling. Maybe it doesn't even need to have a story. I do know that it's one of my favorite photos in recent memory. What's yours?

A moment of parental reason

Had an interesting moment today that I'd like to share. I was scheduled to do two television interviews at the 'A' News studios here in London. The first hit was with CTV Montreal's Todd van der Heyden on the noon-hour news program (topic: Canada's new cell phone landscape, video here), while the second was with Business News Network's Michael Hainsworth, a year-ender interview that used my recently published Betanews column as a jumping off point.

Both interviews went well. They were fun and conversational, and as my wife told me afterward, they're good for my soul because they give me a chance to do something I do well, and something that I love. Wise, she is.

The way-too-kind folks at the station - quite honestly, the nicest people you'll ever meet - managed to juggle the schedule and get me on my way earlier than planned. So as I left the station parking lot, I looked at the clock and realized that our youngest son's class was supposed to be skating in Victoria Park in the middle of London's downtown. I probably should have turned for home and gotten back to the business of writing. I probably should have let logic lead. But I didn't. I set the GPS for the park and didn't look back.

Little man was elated when he realized his dad was walking toward him. He was lying in a snowbank beside the rink, covered in snow, smiling from ear to ear. I hugged his wiggling form before he headed back out to the ice with his classmates and teacher, and I settled in to shep naches (Yiddish, loosely translated as deriving great pleasure from) and watch them frolic. I took pictures. I smiled, probably for the first time in days.

It was a moment I'm glad I took. Because I just don't know how many more like them I'll be privileged enough to have before he decides his dad visiting him in the park on a special afternoon merits a snowy hug.

The writing will get done. Tonight. I'll lose a little sleep in the process. But I'll remember the snippet of time with my son far longer than I'll remember anything I'll end up writing before I tuck in. Treasures take many forms. We just need to stop long enough to recognize when they present themselves to us.

Your turn: Ever follow your heart instead of your head? How did it turn out?

Thematic Photographic 80 - Abstract

Unreal windows
Toronto, ON, December 2009

I tend to view my camera as a bit of a crutch or safe haven, something to lean on or hide behind when things get a little too chaotic around me.

And so I find myself looking at abstract photos I've been taking over the last few months, wondering why I'm capturing so many more abstract scenes than I ever have. I haven't deliberately set out to reshape the world through optics. I guess it's my soul telling me it's okay to run wild every once in a while. Whatever. If seeking out the unreal helps me achieve peace in the midst of a world that seemingly offers none, then it serves its purpose.

With that in mind, I'd like to spend the next week exploring abstract-themed images, and I hope you'll join me. Here's some background.

Your turn: Simply share an abstract - it could be anything...go nuts - on your blog, then paste a link to it in a comment here. Photographic goodness will ensue. Enjoy...and thank you.

A life well lived

Remember when I wrote that nothing good can happen when your phone rings at 2:23 a.m.? Well, I believe the same thing can also apply during the day when your mother tries to reach you at the home office twice in rapid succession. As it was, I was sitting in on a series of phone conferences when she called and I couldn't break away, but seeing her name and number come up twice was enough to raise my antenna.

And sure enough, she had sad news - because she clearly hasn't had enough of it in recent months. My Auntie Freda had passed away. Her husband, the late Uncle Benny, was my maternal grandfather's brother. She was the last of her generation, a truly good soul who was a constant, trusted presence in my young life and, later, the life of my wife and kids.

Logic tells me I should focus on celebrating her life, that I should be thankful we had her for as long as we did: 94 years. But emotion takes over and reminds me that we lost another sweet and gentle member of our family today. I wish I could find a way to hold onto the happy, because each day it seems to get just a little more difficult.

Sigh...

--
Obituary - originally published in the Dec. 21, 2009 Montreal Gazette

Freda (Perlman) Kaplansky
KAPLANSKY, Freda (nee Perlman) Peacefully in her ninety-fifth year, on Tuesday, December 15, 2009, at Extendicare Starwood Nursing Home in Ottawa. Wife of the late Benny Kaplansky. Loving and very devoted mother and mother-in-law of Marvin and Lynn, Ada and the late Stanley Tarnofsky. Cherished Bubbie of Dan and Rena, Jodie, and Lisa and Steven. Proud great-grandmother of Carlee and Skylar. Sister of the late Becky Glustein and the late Solly Perlman. The family would like to thank the staff of Starwood Nursing Home for their compassionate care over the past year. A private graveside service took place on Sunday, December 20th. Arrangements entrusted to Paperman & Sons.