Sunday, October 11, 2009

The circle of life

I'm at the hospital today. I was here yesterday, too. I was here less than a couple of weeks ago, and I fear I'll be back again soon.

My mother-in-law has been here for three weeks. Surgery #3 is scheduled for Tuesday, but you'd be forgiven for writing it on your calendar in pencil, as these things tend to be delayed about as often as Iranian presidents claim their nuclear programs are for peaceful purposes.

We've been spending time with my mom this weekend, our first visit without my dad. It isn't only weird: It's surreal. And running back and forth to the hospital adds another unreal dimension to the proceedings. Not fun, and it won't change anytime soon.

I know that this strange juxtaposition of death, illness and ongoing life holds a number of life-continuity lessons for me. Problem is, I suspect I'm not in the right frame of mind to appreciate them. Not yet, anyway. Perhaps soon.

Which, in the end, is the most important lesson of all: Take the time. I'm slowly starting to get it.

11 comments:

Thom said...

Sending you good thoughts for your MIL and you and your entire family. Life is crazy a lot of times. Just take it a day at a time :)

Thumper said...

It's almost like holding your breath, isn't it? A cacophony of waiting for that other show to drop, praying it won't, hope, love, anguish... Kind of hard to take things slowly when everything just rushes at you.

I think you got it a long time ago...but all this lately has been a pretty cruddy way of having the point driven home.

Awareness said...

Carmi.... Peace to you my friend. May you and your family continue to find the strength through the love you feel for one another. I will be thinking about your mother in law on Tuesday.

Take care friend. You're in life territory that really doesn't have a map or even clear directions. Stay close to one another.... and just take it one moment at time.

ps. I think you got it a long time ago too.

kenju said...

You are deep into the "sandwich generation" Carmi. I hope that your MIL will soon be well enough to leave the hospital.

Tracie said...

Carmi, I'm praying for you and your family.

Rinkly Rimes said...

It's strange ow things seem to happen in a cluster. Maybe having to fret about several things at once is a help!

Mojo said...

Thumper makes a good analogy. It is rather like holding your breath. Just remember to let it out once in a while. Because as any lifeguard will tell you that you have to save yourself first.

Gallow said...

Wow, you do have a lot on your plate. My prayers continue for all of you.

Thank you for sharing what you can. You help all of us in your life lessons.

kcinnova said...

When is it ever the "right time"?

Hoping you are able to find time to be thankful for your blessings, as they are intermixed with so much that doesn't feel like a blessing at all.

Laurie said...

So many challenges in life right now for you and your family. I hope the rhythm of life becomes more comfortable as time goes on. It feels so syncopated and off balance at times like this. It is hard to accept all that life hands us sometimes. All the best to you.

Pamela said...

the downside of having family -- the loosing and the grieving.