How many years?

15.

That, according to the calendar, is how long my wife and I have been married. We celebrated our anniversary today by once again going to the beach in Grand Bend and just being us. It was an amazing day.

But it just doesn't feel like it's been that long. In so many ways, it feels like it's gone by in a blink. Just yesterday we got married. Just yesterday we rented our first apartment and set up our first home. Just yesterday we decided to start a family. Just yesterday we welcomed our son into the world and drove him home with the hazards on. Just yesterday we pulled up stakes and moved to another city. Just yesterday we added two more amazing little folks to our family and watched our three kids grow into incredible people in their own right.

Just yesterday I saw her for the first time and felt like my life had changed in some inexplicably good way. Just yesterday I rode my bike home from her house on a warm summer's evening and knew that she was the one. I wish I knew how 15 years seem to have gone by seemingly overnight.

On the other hand, 15 feels like forever. I don't remember what life was like without her. I don't remember a world that didn't have three smaller versions of us intertwined in our lives. I don't remember what our home was like when it didn't fill slowly with patter and little voices in the morning. I don't remember what it was like to not hear her voice as I slowly awoke. I don't remember what it was like to sleep alone. I don't remember what it was like to not be thinking about her every waking moment. I don't remember what it was like to write before I had my inspiration. I don't wish to ever remember what my life was like before she was a part of it.

It seems like yesterday, and it seems like forever. At the same time. I can't begin to explain the dichotomy, but I don't think I need to. I just need to say thank you for that lightning bolt of incredible luck all those years ago. I just need to say thank you to her for knowing we were bashert (fated) even before I did. I just need to say thank you to her for somehow keeping our family's life on track despite the craziness that I have always brought to it. It isn't easy being married to an always-on creative like me. Yet she somehow makes it seem easy.

Simply put, I am what I am because of her. My life wouldn't have been anywhere near as fulfilling if I hadn't experienced it with her. Indeed, all of this was meant to be.

Call me greedy, but I want a lot more than 15 more years. I don't know how one person deserves as much as I have. But now that I've had it for as long as I've had it, I wish it would never end.

If you haven't met her, please visit her blog and share a wish with her.

Your turn: The Flintstones "Happy Anniversary" song is once again ringing in my ears. How do you mark major anniversaries and/or milestones in your life? Do you count your blessings?

One more thing: I reread my entries from last year and the year before, just because. They brought me peace. If you're new to the blog and you want a smile, feel free to click back in time and see where I come from.