Tuesday, October 04, 2011

Apple iPhone 4S - does it suck?

So new Apple CEO Tim Cook revealed the company's next-generation smartphone, the iPhone 4S, at its "Let's Talk iPhone" event at its headquarters in Cupertino. The company also unveiled updated iPods and reaffirmed the slick new software (iOS5) and services (iCloud, iTunes Match, etc.) that will make the new hardware come alive.

And the fanboys yawned. And they complained. And they tweeted their disappointment. And they ripped their ComicCon t-shirts in protest.

Because it wasn't an "iPhone 5". Because its Siri voice control didn't understand Labrador Retriever. Because it lacked a Star Wars/Princess Leia-like hologram projector. Because it wouldn't make a poached-egg-and-English-toast breakfast, complete with marmelade and juice. Because it wouldn't rescue them from mommy's basement.

I had to blink a few times when I first heard the online equivalent of catcalls. I'm no unabashed Apple cultist - every company has flaws, and I don't believe in drinking anyone's Kool Aid - but it seems somewhat ridiculous for nerds the world over to bash the company for not meeting their lofty expectations. To clarify, the company never actually set any expectations. For months on end leading up to today's event, the nerds were only too happy to whip themselves into a frenzy without Cupertino's help. Blaming the company is a laughable response on a good day.

So, dear nerds, here's the deal: You either like the phone or you don't. You'll either buy it or you won't. The things that it does have precious little do to with what it's called. At the end of the day, it's just a phone. It won't solve Greece's debt crisis, cure an unmentionable disease, make you smarter or funnier or get you a date. It might make it easier for you to update your Facebook status while you're waiting for the bus, but I'm guessing your mom isn't even on Facebook, and she'd rather you just call her. A dowdy old iPhone 4 can do that just fine.

In other words, get a grip, some perspective, and maybe even a life. I suspect you'll buy the damn thing, anyway. After you finish your online whining, you always do.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hmm. Title's a bit misleading. Your piece is more "Do Fanboys Suck?"

Carmi said...

No, the title's not misleading at all. And yes, fanboys suck, too.

Thumper said...

Would everyone have been happy if it had been the identical phone but they'd just called it the iPhone 5?

I don't care what they call it, I just know when my current contract is up for renewal, I'm getting one...

Serendipity said...

Where is this frustration coming from? Where is cool Carmi with his wisdom-filled/thought-provocative post?

Levonne said...

Well, I'm excited about Amazon's FIRE tablet. I don't have an iPad but thought it might be nice to have one if not for the price.

Michael Manning said...

Well said, Carmi. This is a fair post about the company and product, and I say this as one who doesn't own an Ipod at this point. Nevertheless, your point is a good one about people raising a lot of grief about nothing. Apple is an impressive company!

lissa said...

My prediction: even those railing at the non-iPhone-5 release and denouncing this as less-than will be lined up to get themselves an iPhone 4S. Just sayin'.